It’s not Stonehenge but this rock formation is – or was – as beloved in Norway as the standing stones are in England. Unfortunately, fans of Trollpikken went limp this weekend when news spread that the natural erection, whose name means 'troll cock',♠♠ had been amputated by vandals. The destruction comes less than a week after vandals scraped messages in the moss covering the beloved boob-shaped hills of Nesjavallaleið in southern Iceland. This is why we can’t have nice things that resemble sex organs. Is Trollpikken down for good?
“It looks like someone has used a drill on top. This is vandalism, there is no doubt.”
According to Norwegian media, Olav Magne Egebakken was one of the first to find the broken Trollpikken while out jogging on June 24th. The news spread quickly across the Internet as pictures were posted showing before and after images of the former phallus formation that residents of Eigersund had hoped would raise tourism much the same way Trolltunga – that’s an easier one to translate – brings visitors to Ringedalsvatnet. What is it with Norwegians, strange rocks and troll body parts?
“This is simply sad! (Trollpikken was) created by nature (but) sadly destroyed by humans.”
Eigersund Mayor Odd Stangeland (if you were going to make up a name for a fake story – which this isn’t – Odd Stangeland would be a great one) was somewhat cheered up later in the weekend by local contractor Sverre Garpestad, who says he can lift Trollpikken with helicopters and reattach it using little blue bolts and mortar.
“We have the Viagra it takes."
While Mayor Odd Stangeland (can’t stop saying it) may consider this to be a medical condition that has cut off the circulation of tourist dollars in his city, it’s not covered by Norway’s otherwise comprehensive public health care system. While he didn’t indicate how much he thought it would cost, a crowdfunding project was set up to raise 200,000 Norwegian krone $23,643 U.S. dollars) and within a day had already been pledged 90,000 krone (about $10,650)
“The evidence is there and we’ve got pictures,”
Meanwhile, Magnar Sandstøl, acting police chief in Eigersund, says Norwegian cops are hot on the case. Damaging any kind of rock formation in Norway – even those not resembling sex organs – is punishable by up to six years in prison, so the culprit or culprits may be lying as low as the Trollpikken for a while.
Meanwhile, let’s join Mayor Odd Stangeland (one more time) in hoping that Trollpikken will someday rise again.