You’ve probably seen signs on public transportation that read “Children under 6 ride free” or “Senior citizens ride free” or even “Veterans ride free.” Have you ever seen one that reads: “Flat Earthers ride free”?
“The earth is flat, we are terrapiattisti, ambassadors out of every planetary jurisdiction and therefore we don't pay for the train ticket."
You’ve got to hand it to the Flat Earthers – they never give up. One group is planning a world cruise to prove the Earth is flat. Another is planning a boat ride around Antarctica to prove it’s actually a 60,000-mile wall of ice holding in all of the waters of the flat Earth. Futile as those trips might be, they’re at least paying their own way. Not so with a group of “Platists” who were riding on the Milan-Ventimiglia train recently. According to La Provenica Pavice, four adults – three men and a woman – were asked by the conductor at the Pavia stop to present their tickets and they instead gave a laminated sheet stating that they were participating in “self-determination” as “representatives of living countries composed of a single inhabitant” and as such the requirement to pay for public transportation was:
"An attack on a free State pursued by the International Criminal Court."
Take that, you Round Earthers!
Let’s see if we can follow the line of argument here. They believe that Galileo was wrong about the Earth being round. This entitles them to declare themselves individual countries of one resident and set their own laws, which puts them outside of all other pre-existing international laws, especially laws governing payment for public transportation. Furthermore, they believe demanding a ticket is an attack on their free state and their right to “freely circulate” around the world and that this will hold up in the International Criminal Court.
Wouldn’t you like to be present in The Hague when this case comes up?
Needless to say, the conductor was not pleased … nor were the other passengers when the Flat Earthers held up the train for nearly an hour until the Carabinieri arrived. The Royal Carabineers Corps are the national gendarmerie of Italy who primarily carry out domestic policing duties. They hauled the Flat Earthers off the train and charged them with interrupting a public service and refusing to provide general information.
Is believing the Earth is flat worth going to jail for? Does it give you the right to form your own country-of-one and declare your own laws? What does Galileo have to do with riding trains?
This protest didn’t prove the Earth is flat. Then again, the arrest of the Flat Earthers didn’t prove the Earth is round either. Is the flat-or-round-Earth debate going the way of so many disputes today … to court?
One thing is for certain … there won’t be a shortage of lawyers willing to take the case.