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Romanian Witches Use Internet to Cast World Wide Spells

In 1993, The New Yorker published a now-famous cartoon featuring two dogs, with one sitting in front of a computer screen and saying to the other, “On the Internet, nobody knows you’re a dog.” That quip proved to be prescient as it became a popular meme about the anonymity the Internet provides while ignoring the animosity it fosters. However, the medium can still be a tool for good as some mediums in Romania are now bragging. That country’s large and growing witch community has taken the Internet by strum und drang and is providing various psychic services to clients around the world who may not know they’re talking to a Romanian witch. Progress? What would the dog think?

“A truly powerful witch can solve problems from a distance. It’s not the phone or Facebook that are doing the magic. It’s the words that we’re saying, the rituals that we’re doing and it’s enough to look each other in the eye for the ritual to work.”

In an interview with Reuters, Cassandra Buzea explained how her family business (her mother, Mihaela Minca, is also a witch and taught her the craft) has expanded by using the Internet. It’s not just Facebook or the iPhone, she says, but the ability to look customers in the eye via Facetime is key to giving Internet rituals the same power as face-to-face time. It’s that power, plus the ability to communicate with many other witches at one in a kind of virtual coven, that’s the crux of the Reuters article.

“We will continue this ritual on the 25th of May. We will do a powerful ritual against the Romanian government, so on the 26th when the European elections are taking place we will cast our spell for the good of the country.”

While the Internet has brought Romania’s 4,000 witches into the 21st century, they still suffer from the fears and prejudices of ancient times, even though this ability to mass organize has turned them into a force of good against the country’s corrupt government officials (isn’t that redundant?). Mihaela Minca has moved up from 50 euros ($56.11) tarot readings to bringing the combined power of witches around the world against the ruling powers of Romania by attempting to psychically influence the upcoming European Parliament elections to put officials in EU offices who will keep Romanian officials under close watch and restraints as they try to reverse the reforms of the past decade – reforms that have made it easier for witches to move out of the dark corners and into the world of entrepreneurship and the gig economy.

“Those who don’t do their jobs, those who have bad intentions, will lose their positions and suffer health problems.”

Witches banding together against the government seems to be a growing trend around the world. A well-known example occurred in New York in February 2017 when witches organized over the Internet in an attempt to stop the current U.S. president from using the phrase “witch hunt.” That didn’t seem to work out so well … or is it too soon to tell? They did the same during the last Supreme Court nomination hearings with failing results. Is this due to the Internet weakening their power rather than strengthening it? Does the anonymity of the Web lessen the strength of the witches’ web to catch the corrupt and change their behavior? Should they stick to tarot readings?

If, on the Internet, no one knows you’re a witch, does that mean Internet spells no longer have a psychic bite? Until the EU elections, perhaps only a dog can answer that.

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Paul Seaburn is the editor at Mysterious Universe and its most prolific writer. He’s written for TV shows such as "The Tonight Show", "Politically Incorrect" and an award-winning children’s program. He's been published in “The New York Times" and "Huffington Post” and has co-authored numerous collections of trivia, puzzles and humor. His “What in the World!” podcast is a fun look at the latest weird and paranormal news, strange sports stories and odd trivia. Paul likes to add a bit of humor to each MU post he crafts. After all, the mysterious doesn't always have to be serious.
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