Aleister Crowley—AKA The Great Beast 666, The Master Therion, The Wickedest Man In The World—was an occultist, magician, and founder of the religion of Thelema. One of the most influential figures in bringing occultism into popular culture, Uncle Al definitely knew how to market himself. He also just shows up everywhere. You’d be hard-pressed to find a story involving the strange or paranormal that isn’t two or three degrees of separation from Crowley—maximum. And now the ashes of Boleskine House, his home on Loch Ness—yes, that Loch Ness—are up for sale. Who wouldn’t want their very own bag of scorched remains from the Great Beast’s house? Now for the low, low price of £49, you can bring a bag into your own home and pray that nothing remotely similar to the fate that befell Bolskine House befalls your own. Good luck with that.
Boleskine House has been badly damaged by two fires in recent years. The first fire occurred in December 2015, and the most recent blaze happened this past July. Keith and Kyra Readdy formed the not-for-profit Boleskine House Foundation have been working for years to restore the house on Loch Ness. While the latest fire was certainly a setback, they’re making the best of it by selling the charred remains to raise money for the restoration. Somewhere beyond the grave, Crowley is cackling with delight.
The Ebay product description for the charred remains reads:
You are purchasing one original stone of up to 400g and one bag of charred remains from the fire on 31 July 2019 from Boleskine House. The package comes with a certificate of authenticity as per the photograph. Each order will be one stone, one bag of charred remains and one certificate.
This isn’t the first sale of Boleskine ashes, either. The Boleskine House Foundation had previously sold the remains of the 2015 fire on Ebay. The fire in 2015 destroyed the vast majority of Boleskine House, while the fire in July took out the remaining wing of the house.
Aleister Crowley used Boleskine House as a secluded location to practice ritual magick. Famously, he began a ritual to summon and bind the 12 Kings and Dukes of Hell in an effort to remove them from his life. However, Crowley left in the middle of the ritual and left it undone. He had his reasons, I’m sure. It seems ill-advised to be so cavalier with the Kings of Hell, and, according to legend, that’s when things got real wacky around Boleskine House.
Personally, I’m all set with owning anything that was ever in close physical proximity to Aleister Crowley. The dude shows up too often for my liking as it is. But hey, you know, do as thou wilt.