If you could travel back in time and you wanted to warn Native Americans that invaders were coming to change their lives forever, how much lead time would you give them? A month? A year? A decade? How much warning would you give Polish Jews before Hitler arrived? That’s one question which needs to be asked of @futuretimetraveller – a self-proclaimed “Time Traveller From The Future” who posted on TikTok (the new preferred method of mass communication by time travelers – sorry, YouTube) that 7-foot-4-inch aliens with large yet familiar scary heads are on their way to Earth. How much lead time do you think he gave us?
“What you call Aliens will make their first appearance on Earth next year. The exact date they’re first sighted – May 24th, 2022.”
That’s less than a year away! Should we be preparing a welcome wagon or convincing Richard Branson to put lasers on his new spaceship?
“They are about 7 foot 4 and have long shaped skulls, dark grey and distorted appearance.”
That doesn’t sound benevolent, even in the Shaquille O’Neal sense. However, he says they’re the good kind. Of course, the powers that be have seen “Independence Day” and “War of the Worlds.”
“This group of Aliens are called Nirons and come in peace and don’t mean harm but the U.S. attack them and begin the first of many interdimensional wars.”
“Nirons” … if that name sounds familiar, you may remember a different time traveler — @thatonetimetraveler — who claimed to be from the year 2485 and warned us on TikTok in April that the Nirons are coming from Neptune in five years and a war with them will cause a pandemic called the “Nozic virus.” Hmmm. Another TikTok time traveler talking Nirons. Wonder if they know each other. Care to comment, @futuretimetraveller?
“I am from the year 2491 and I was born on Saturn (I’m still human).”
“I met with an undisclosed man claiming he was from the future. He told me I have to be silent about this stuff or I will be silenced so I did. But he was never in my database so I figure he is lying so now I’m back to inform you about the future.”
Are they dueling TikTok time travelers competing for the right to save the world and become a hero in the 2400s?
“Q: Do we win the first Interdimensional War?
OK, if he’s not here to stop the war and save humanity, why is @futuretimetraveller (and @thatonetimetraveler for that matter) here? Do they know TikTok time traveler @authentictimetraveler, who revealed (incorrectly) that astronauts would discover a planet exactly like Earth (only a mirror-image) in our solar system on May 8, 2021? Or how about TikTok time traveler @timetraveler2582 who revealed that “Starting at 00h00 UTC on the June 6, 2026, the Earth will enter into three days of darkness.”
Do you notice any common threads connecting all of these TikTok time travelers? Obviously, they’re all on TikTok and concerned about view totals. That sounds trivial for someone powerful enough to travel in time, doesn’t it? They all claim to be from the late 2800s. At least two of them refer to the Nirons. And, most importantly, not one of them offers any proof of their revelations nor any visible sign from the future … they don’t even reveal their pixelated faces like some other ‘time travelers’ in the past have done.
Could all of these TikTok time travelers be the same present time prankster? Perhaps it’s time to agree with the skeptical meter whose needle is firmly planted in the “Are you kidding me?” quadrant and send these TikTok time travelers back to the planet NFW. Or is reading their ‘reveals’ too much fun?
One more thing. If you really ARE a time traveler, can you give us a little more advance warning? If you really are what you say you are, that should be easy, right?